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rhyllIt's hard to do all the things i need to do, when my brain is trying its best to cripple me. Or, since i'm trying to avoid the mind-body-self division...when somehow i seem to be shooting myself in the foot for much of the time.
I haven't felt great for the last few days. I made myself go to capoeira (usually helps), and ended up with a headache bad enough that i went and cried in the toilets for a while (see, i can admit that because i'm confidence with my masculinity...or something like that...) Walked home feeling sooky, trying very hard to open my eyes wide and breathe in the night air and see the sky and the trees.
I got some tending, which helped.
And today I've had enough of all the sad. Today is the day for back on my feet, and back to work.
Competing explanations for all the sad, possible solutions:
Not taking care of myself: eat properly, get exercise, drink enough water.
Too many things to be stressed about: don't fret about things i can't do anything about. get more work done. remember that i just have to try, for capoeira, and if i look like an idiot or don't get as good as i'd like to be...well, that's why i make myself do activities like capoeira.
Regular, boring, low-grade depression: remember that it comes, and, more importantly, goes. exercise. not letting it shape how i see everything else in my life. eat properly. look at the world with wonder. breathe deep. all that.
A lack of things to be excited about: remember wonderful people in my life, and make my time with them special. Get in touch with people again. write. paint. get into my work.
ok. there. now, don't fret.
It will all be fine, i've decided.
I haven't felt great for the last few days. I made myself go to capoeira (usually helps), and ended up with a headache bad enough that i went and cried in the toilets for a while (see, i can admit that because i'm confidence with my masculinity...or something like that...) Walked home feeling sooky, trying very hard to open my eyes wide and breathe in the night air and see the sky and the trees.
I got some tending, which helped.
And today I've had enough of all the sad. Today is the day for back on my feet, and back to work.
Competing explanations for all the sad, possible solutions:
Not taking care of myself: eat properly, get exercise, drink enough water.
Too many things to be stressed about: don't fret about things i can't do anything about. get more work done. remember that i just have to try, for capoeira, and if i look like an idiot or don't get as good as i'd like to be...well, that's why i make myself do activities like capoeira.
Regular, boring, low-grade depression: remember that it comes, and, more importantly, goes. exercise. not letting it shape how i see everything else in my life. eat properly. look at the world with wonder. breathe deep. all that.
A lack of things to be excited about: remember wonderful people in my life, and make my time with them special. Get in touch with people again. write. paint. get into my work.
ok. there. now, don't fret.
It will all be fine, i've decided.