saving my sanity for later

complicated.
i agree with phil. it does feel like a new phase, and not one that's necessarily going to be pleasant.

i'm going to play dressups and wear badly-done makeup and write a lot. i might try nanowrimo again. i think i'll abandon any attempt at plot and just write and write.

(there's still an exam left to do, a thing to remember.)

and baka and i are going to try and become less co-dependent. it's nice, how much support our attention brings us. but at the same time there are worries that it's not healthy. i don't know. i've never really got the hang of people. anyway. we're taking Steps.

and j finally called me last night, for the first time in about two weeks.

interesting times, as they say.

i am so fucking scared right now that everyone's going to explode in a haze of alcohol and tears.

damn. i'm just going to shower and dress up and bake cake for our neighbours and stop fretting.