serendipity

[rhyll]

i'm procrastinating, and thinking about the people in my life.

i have so many moments where i'll be halfway through talking to someone, or hanging around with them, or even just thinking about them, and suddenly i'll realise how special they are to me.

one of my friends is lost in their own world, and i'm not sure how to fix it. sometimes it's like they're just sleepwalking and not here at all.

another one who i realise i'm getting closer and closer to. each time we have an excellent conversation i'm happily surprised.

mr wolf, who reports back to me after half a day away. and i never expected that to happen, but now i don't ever want to let go.

a new friend, just starting off and it's odd and pleasant and another unanticipated development.

and i never saw any of them coming, and it still surprises me. (why does it come as a shock that i have friends who are so special to me?) and i want to wave my wand for all of them and fill their worlds with fairy dust. it's so hard not to tell them all the time how much they mean to me, and pick fights with their dragons.

but on friday i did a psychometric test for some job in canberra. i'm wondering what's going to happen next.

i wanted to be bolder and tougher. i wanted to look like someone who smoked and didn't care that they were going to die alone.

i wanted it not to matter where i went next year.

Comments

[corellion.livejournal.com]

Things have started mattering? Surely this is what life is meant to be about anyway ... regardless of how inconvenient it may be?

pfft

[alexmoon.livejournal.com]

well of course you're right. quite often, young man, it seems that you're far more mature than many give you credit for.