i'm in the mood for burning bridges
Jul. 4th, 2005 12:49 pmi'm been writing up 'cessation of friendship' letters in my head. i am actually seriously considering sending some of them, monumentally stupid as that is.
there would be a standard form, with a personalised section, and they would be sent out by mail.
because, sometimes, i just really want people to know how i feel. despite how stupid that would be. i know that it's far cleverer to just let friendships fade away, once it becomes clear that it's not working. but i'm sad and i'm hurt and sometimes i just want to let people know. i don't know. this (probably vastly untrue) feeling that if i just let people know how they've hurt me i'll be able to let go of the anger and the hurt.
i would like to say to two people, more eloquently than i have here:
x: you thought i stopped spending time with you because a new friend replaced you. and you were probably somewhat shitty about it. but i kept asking you to do stuff, and making time for you, and you never reciprocated.
y: i was there for you when you needed me, and then you stopped needing me and i wasn't any fun because i wouldn't take speed and go out dancing every weekend. when i asked for help you ignored it.
yes. i know this is whiny and self-involved. but i have to vent some place.
also, i've just sent what is probably an incredibly ill-advised sms. which i meant when i sent it, but on reflection i think it was just a desperate last-ditch effort to get j to change. and he isn't going to, and given that, i think it's probably going to be for the best when he takes it at face value. even if it does tear me to shreds for a while.
ok. now i'm done. i promise, as of now, to have more interesting entries, with far less waaah. venting: tick, done.
there would be a standard form, with a personalised section, and they would be sent out by mail.
because, sometimes, i just really want people to know how i feel. despite how stupid that would be. i know that it's far cleverer to just let friendships fade away, once it becomes clear that it's not working. but i'm sad and i'm hurt and sometimes i just want to let people know. i don't know. this (probably vastly untrue) feeling that if i just let people know how they've hurt me i'll be able to let go of the anger and the hurt.
i would like to say to two people, more eloquently than i have here:
x: you thought i stopped spending time with you because a new friend replaced you. and you were probably somewhat shitty about it. but i kept asking you to do stuff, and making time for you, and you never reciprocated.
y: i was there for you when you needed me, and then you stopped needing me and i wasn't any fun because i wouldn't take speed and go out dancing every weekend. when i asked for help you ignored it.
yes. i know this is whiny and self-involved. but i have to vent some place.
also, i've just sent what is probably an incredibly ill-advised sms. which i meant when i sent it, but on reflection i think it was just a desperate last-ditch effort to get j to change. and he isn't going to, and given that, i think it's probably going to be for the best when he takes it at face value. even if it does tear me to shreds for a while.
ok. now i'm done. i promise, as of now, to have more interesting entries, with far less waaah. venting: tick, done.